A Pound of Flesh

It’s truly amazing the difference one pound can make.  I’ve been on an eclectic combination of diets and exercise regimes for ages now, but I’ve only really been actively trying to lost weight since May.  Since then, I have been losing weight slowly but surely.  I’ve lost a total of thirteen pounds.  In the grand scheme of things, that isn’t even all that much though so I wasn’t even sure that anyone could tell.  Granted, friends and family all made the requisite comments: Are you getting thinner?…You look healthier?….blah, blah, blah.  For some reason, I just can’t bring myself to believe it when it is coming from them.  I mean, they’re supposed to say those things even if I’ve sprouted contagious skin lesions and gained fifty pounds to boot.  So it’s not like they’re trustworthy on such lofty matters…

Yesterday, I was very excited when I got what I had thought to be my first real acknowledgement.  A customer who comes to the hotel every week came up and said that I looked like I had lost weight.  I didn’t want to gloat so I said that I could hardly tell.  His response: You can see it in your face; it’s thinner this week than it was last Tuesday.

I said my thanks and we moved on to talk of animated movies and geodes.  (Hey, I never said we were normal!)  However, his words festered in the back of my mind all night.  They even came back in my dreams last night.  Granted, they were said by a cat with razor-sharp fangs in a pink bowler hat but….well…you get the idea…

So today I stepped on the scale out of curiosity and yes, I had lost weight between Tuesdays: one measly pound to be exact.  My immediate thought: How the hell can one pound and a week’s time make someone’s face look thinner??!!  It defies all logic and I’m soooooo not okay with that.

It was disheartening too.  I mean now how do I ever trust anyone’s opinion of my apparent weight loss or lack thereof?  When even random acquaintances will lie about it, how can I ever know how effective my weird dieting schemes are? 

It’s frustrating too because I like honesty.  I’m not sensitive; I know I’m overweight.  However, I also know that I’m working on it.  It sucks that society has such an obsession with obesity and weight that you can’t even get an honest opinion anymore.  I swear, sometimes I think people are afraid of fat people.  What, do they think it’s contagious or something?!  “I better say she looks thinner or I’ll find those pounds she claims to have lost!”  Honestly!

This fear of obesity is everywhere too.  I noticed it on eharmony the other day too.  Since I’ve sworn to start this whole online dating thing, I’ve been looking at different sites to see what they’re all about.  Eharmony seemed pretty interesting since it claims to match people based on “personality traits”.  Too bad many of those “personality traits” were really about physical appearance…

There was one section in particular that I found to be particularly perverse.  It asked you to truthfully decide whether or not different statements could describe you.  One of them was “I am overweight.”  There was a ranking scale, but I had no idea how to determine whether I am one, two, or three levels above somewhat overweight.  They didn’t ask for my BMI or even my weight.  Nope, they just asked if society would call me overweight.  Well, the answer to that is easily yes.  However, I’m not as overweight as some people are–does that make me a level lower?  Two levels?  How do you know???  Shoot, in this country, anyone above a size six should probably be marking the highest level if we are to go by society’s impressions of weight…

Ugh!

Then, the ensuing statements were even worse:

  • I am attractive.
  • I am sensual.
  • Healthy eating habits are important to me.
  • Ecercise is an important part of my life.

…Blah…blah…blah…

How can anyone answer those statements with a positive response when the previous question casts them in such a negative light? It’s appalling.  Of course, I’m not one to be insulted so I vengefully marked all of those in the affirmative.  After all, they’re true!!  Being fat doesn’t make you less appealing.  Being an idiot who cares about that sort of stuff makes you less appealing.

Needless to say, eharmony did not win my vote or my money…

It did make me laugh though because people can be so petty sometimes…and petty people need to be laughed at the way that I need these new healthy lifestyle changes.  After all, they too could stand to lose something.  At least I can say that I’m working on it…

You know though, there is one good thing about this lost pound of flesh of mine.  It’s a marker for me.  Just twenty pounds more and I can finally–FINALLY!!–buy the DVD set of Star Trek I’ve been craving for AGES!!!

Live long and prosper!

The Butcher of the Bard

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9 Responses to A Pound of Flesh

  1. Ms. Moran says:

    I was thinking about this very topic today. I’m only about a week and a half into my diet and I was wondering how long it would be before anyone noticed. I’m not telling my coworkers that I’m dieting. They have seen me go up and down and up again so many times that I just don’t want to get into it. I’m wondering how long it will take before someone says something to me? How many pounds will it take?

    • Ugh seriously right?! I think people stop believing you at a certain point. And really, how is that their place or their business. It’s that sort of fatalistic attitude from the rest of the world that (I think) makes people gain it all back again. We need the people in our lives to be our cheerleaders, but we need them to do it honestly and to genuinely mean it. Is that really too much to ask??…

  2. toadette16 says:

    Wait, like the original series DVD set?! Because if that’s true then you need to start losing quicker and we so have to watch those together. 😉

    I’m so proud of you though! I am trying to lose weight but only in my head. It sucks that a time in my life when I’m really committed to the idea is also the time when I’m so freaking busy at work the first time I got a lunch break in two weeks was today. If I’m up early, I go into work early – that’s the gist of it. The gym is a distant memory – yet I still have the guilt of not going. Such a sad vicious cycle.

    You need to stop taking people’s comments as either honesty of lies though. Maybe the whole pound you lost was in your face – maybe half of it was. That pound has to come off somewhere, why not your face. And maybe you’re so excited about your progress that you’re happy and shiny about it so your face looks thinner. Maybe panting at the gym burned face muscles. You need to take the compliment for its ‘face’ value (did you see what I did there?) and not assume that he was lying or being dishonest. If he didn’t think it was true, was there really a reason for him to be buttering you up? No – stop overthinking everything. This girl over here jealous of your progress will overthink life enough for the both of us, you just enjoy your awesome success. (Last time I stepped on the scale I’d gained back half of the weight I told you I’d lost before – I hate scales and my inability to beat them at their own game.)

    And more than society being obsessed with weight, we need to stop being obsessed with weight. If we are truly happy and fine with who we are, then the people we meet and interact with will be too. Being okay with the people we are, no matter what the number on the scale says is the real way to land a man – and yes, let’s all say it together now, “easier said than done.”

    • Thanks hon! I’ll try to take your advice this time…no really I will 😉 In all seriousness though, you need to as well. You know what I’ve found helps for those days when you’re just to busy to sit and ride the stationary bike is to sit less at work instead. Standing burns more calories. Walk around your office a few more times. I’d say take the stairs but you don’t have them anymore right? Besides, we all know that could be disastrous for you =) ….

      • Valerie says:

        I know I do – I really, REALLY do. We do have stairs at my new office but we know how dangerous stairs for me can be. I actually already fell in the office just by walking in a straight line in the bathroom. Awesome right?

        You know, I am not sitting at my desk most of the day. I’m here and there and over there and then, oh, over helping this person over here. I walk down the hallway quite a lot at work actually. And Diane and I decided we wanted to try and walk after dinner when it isn’t too hot. We’ve only done it once but it was nice.

        I know it sounds like I’m putting stuff off but once I’m done with the freaking book then I won’t be staying up as late so I can get up earlier and make it to the gym. I really miss the gym – not the working out part, that sucked but it gave me energy and that I NEED. I’ve been doing pretty good with the eating but I’m too much like my mother – I expect too much, get defeatist and then fall off the wagon. Maybe I’ll go tomorrow morning . . .

      • Just don’t judge yourself and you’ll be fine methinks =)

  3. toadette16 says:

    If only not judging yourself was easy . . .

  4. vickilouise says:

    Think about how much a pound is…go pick up a pound of ground beef and think hey I lost this this week! It’s something and something is better than nothing…and hey the scale is not the only thing that matters…go a month without weighing and just weigh yourself once a month after working out and eating right…i bet you will be amazed. BTW 13 pounds is amazing don’t doubt that!

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